Too Much Time On My Hands

Apologies to Styx.

Sooooo, I was wondering where the Bible and this blog intersects. I mean, a blog this crappy has to be in God's plan somewhere... it doesn't just crawl out of the cosmic soup! An exhaustive year's long journey of silent contemplation and hippie beatings has revealed the truth. Behold!

Wonder Where I've Been?

Training... thanks to Mr. Mahar.

Pretty Cool

Quitting the Demon

Originally posted in May 2006... I'm reposting this now after over three years as a quitter!

So, I was sitting in my office a couple years ago and I had my lip full of copenhagen, as per S.O.P. and I was hurtin'. My mouth was a mass of sores, I couldn't brush my teeth without gums bleeding and I was just sick of feeling like a slave to nicotine. So I hopped onto Google and typed in quit dipping... and *POW* I found a website called Quit Smokeless. I immediately recognized that this was my chance to quit... for good.The article here is one that really spoke to me. It begins:

Although we have never met, I know you. You started chewing tobacco around high school. It quickly became part of your personality, part of your behavior, and part of your life. At some point, you developed a bad sore throat and thought, "Oh my God, please do not let it be cancer." You decided to quit for the first time. But your throat got better, and one thing lead to another, and you bought another tin.

Since then, you have tried to quit many, many times. You have blown through countless "quit deadlines," like "I will quit when I graduate," "I will quit when I get a job," "I will quit when I am (20)(25)(30)(35)," "I will quit when the baby is born," "I will quit when my workload lightens up," and "I will quit on New Years." But, when the deadline came, it was never a good time to quit. Or you quit for a while, but then some problem or stress came into your life and you just "had" to go back to the tin (what was that problem?). Or you quit for someone else (wife, girlfriend, etc.), but then they made you angry, so you started to chew again. No one is going to tell you what to do.

At some point, you stopped telling the people around you that you were trying to quit tobacco, because it was just too embarassing when you failed. You covered yourself for years with "I do not want to quit," so that no one knows you're completely addicted. It's not like you are an alcoholic or drug addict, right? For the same reasons, you never asked anyone for their help or support, because you are not some spineless, weak-mind junkie who "needs help." And besides, they would never understand it anyway, because "they" just think it's some stupid or gross "spit" habit.

Ultimately, you just resigned to your addiction. You justified it with "It is my only bad habit," "The risk of getting oral cancer is (small/exaggerated/not real/for heavy users/for hillbillies/for people who don't brush their teeth)," "I need tobacco to (work/write/concentrate/be productive/play ball/live)," "I am happier with tobacco," "If I get cancer, I get cancer. Everyone dies of something," And Now, you have been chewing tobacco for years and years, and you couldn't quit, even if you wanted to.

And then you found this website

WOW! You'll have to read on. One of the great things about it was that you could join an online support group of guys (and gals in some cases) that you could chat with to help you get through. Mr. Matt van Wyk was the man who started and ran the site. As of 14 May 2006 he gave up maintaining this part of the site. A fellow quitter whose handle is Flavius Victor started a mirror site that replaced the online chat forum. God bless him. It's interim site is found here.

If you are a dipper... or know a dipper who is looking to quit. Please direct them to this site. I dipped constantly for twenty years and finally freed myself of addiction. It was hard, really damn hard. It was also the best thing that I have done for myself in my life. Check it out and please let me know what ya'll think and experience.

Time

Wow, I can't believe how quickly the week was spent. Of course, they say that time moves more quickly as you get older. I always thought that was a myth, but my own experience tells me differently. What is it about age that causes the velocity of time to increase? I have a theory.

Watching my (nearly) one year-old, I have noticed that she is aware of everything. Nothing escapes her notice, even if for only a moment. For example, we were driving the other day and she probably noticed: the lush green foliage (gotta love spring), all the flowering bushes and plants, the sparkle of the other clean cars, the smell of the leather underneath her seat, the baby CD playing in the background (seriously, kill me), etcetera. The list could go on forever.

Compare that to what I noticed. How closely the guy behind me was following, whether or not I was going to make the light, thinking about what I wanted to accomplish that day, etcetera.

The fundamental difference between my daughter and I is that I have already seen and experienced everything that she observed on our drive. I may have noticed foliage, flowers, and a snazzy car, but I moved on because it is more of the same. I believe that time moves more quickly as we age because we process our current experience through the filter of past experience. We get flashes of new, but we generally don't appreciate it.

A couple years ago, Sexy Squirrel and I drove cross country. While it didn't last long enough, the new sights, sounds, and people definitely made a difference in how quickly time seemed to be ticking. Also, we didn't worry much about when we would get somewhere, we just opened the moon roof and enjoyed! Also, at the end of it all, we eventually took nearly three weeks off. Now THAT is a real vacation!

I'm sure that there are more elements to it, but that is one Squirrel's view.

2007 Milblog Conference

It started with a meeting at the Carpool in Arlington, Virginia... just down the street from the Westin Hotel, where the Conference took place.

Happy hour was awesome. I met a ton of people and should have taken notes. The funny thing was that Blackfive was the only person that I would recognize from his face time on CNN. So I hooked up with Teresa as we searched for fellow milbloggers, and then we hung out till Matt showed up. I met people from The Weekly Standard, ThreatsWatch (hey Mike), Wired Magazine (Noah... cool cat), Buckethead, lots of Soldiers Angels (donate now), Andi from Andi's World, Jim Thompson (Sgt. Hook), John Noonan (OPFOR), Sean and "pink-haired-wife" from Doc in the Box, ArmyWifeToddlerMom (who is a force of nature, BTW), and of course Blackfive. I have to leave my last shout-out to Squirrel Lurker, Rich Lowe. Rich was the only person who I didn't know and had read my crapblog. He was a great guy and I only wish that I had more time to spend with him. He has actually motivated me to tell more stories and throw some Squirrel Spin on things. Thanks Rich... you can still lurk, but I hope that you don't (please send me an email). There are tons of others, but the beer has ruined that part of my memory.

We drank too much and I had to disappear a bit for some work stuff, but I rejoined the group at the Westin for the "formal" party. Of course, I had come from the range and looked like the proto-typical doorkicker in utilities pants and khaki ballcap. Ah well, at least I got to attend. I had some more drinks (I still owe Noah a cold one for saving a cashless Squirrel) and must have looked pretty scary. I talked to Mary Katherine Ham for a moment and she couldn't seem to get away fast enough. Nice woman, but clearly squirrly about the Squirrel. LOL! Too much fun.

Anyway, I managed to sneak out at some point, only to have Buckethead yell at me from a balcony. Thanks. Thanks for pointing out my weak exit. Ah well, at least he didn't think I was a zombie as I shambled back to Carpool (where my damned Visa sits to this minute).

Great success. I got to have some milblogger time and still had the weekend with the family (which was awesome)! Now I get to go back and see what happened by reading everyone else's blogs. Nice.

Join The Squirrel and Blackfive This Friday!

If you're in the D.C. Metro area, I'll be joining some fellow milbloggers for happy hour. Find more information here!

VA Tech

Evil still walks the earth. I watched the douchebag's video and was amazed at his insincere and plastic attempts at painting himself as the victim. Rest in Hell, Cho.

My prayers are with the friends and families of the victims.

A Right Good Ass Kickin'

No excuses. Simply put, life has overtaken my ability to dedicated any time to this blog. I actually don't really even know what is going on in the world. Hell, maybe that's not a bad thing. I know that I owe some Boer War analysis, and I will try and fill in more background. But, I'm afraid it will have to wait as I take a hiatus from blogging for the time being. Please check in from time-to-time and see if I have overcome life. Keep your powder dry!

- FS

Back in the Saddle

Sheesh. Okay, gone for two weeks and I'm, like, totally smoked. I don't have a creative drip left in my body, so you'll have to bear with me as I conjure up something sufficiently crappy for you. Thanks for noticing that the lights have been off in the house. Luckily, I didn't end up like this guy. I did manage to get away from work for one evening (I was down on the Gulf Coast) and hit New Orleans and an exceptionally chilly Mardi Gras. Sweeeet. Alas, it was too cold for the chicas to earn beads. Bummer. My favorite bar was a place called "Bourbon Cowboy." Totally recommend it. Other than that, I'm just plain pooped. When on travel, I always log in tons of hours cause I figure, "hell, I'm away for the family... so why not?" Oh, additional information... I stayed at a very nice Hotel and Casino while on travel. Highly recommend it as lodging of choice.

Well, even though it is getting late on Saturday night, I've gotta keep getting some work done. No doubt I'll have my batteries fully recharged this weekend. Till next post, "so long... and thanks for all the fish!"

Meanwhile, check out this video via Michelle Malkin. Then go visit the Victory Caucus and see which Republicans crossed the line.

On Travel

My apologies. I've been (and continue to be) on travel and working my a$$ off. I hope to have some more Boer posts up to fill the void.

Gay's Anatomy

My wife and I watch this truly crappy show called "Grey's Anatomy." Recently it was revealed that the guy who plays that monumental pussy named George... is gay. I'm sorry, you mean someone actually thought he was straight? Puulease.

One of the things that my wife likes about me and my buddies (think doorkickin' military) is that we are "men." There is virtually no ambiguity and homo-erotic banter is greeted with guffaws and snappy comebacks. For example, I've spooned with buddies on freezing nights in the field. One buddy actually saved me from dying from hypothermia that way. Hey thanks, Bill... by the way, don't think I didn't notice the wood... homo. See?

Winna, Winna, Chicken Dinna!

Yep, I won week one of the Squirrely Biggest Loser! Woo Hoo. Unfortunately, guys always rock at the beginning. I lost seven pounds last week and really only have another 15 to go before I hit my goal weight. In short, there is no freakin' way that I'll repeat that amount next week. I kinda screwed myself. Anyway, I do feel better and am already experiencing increased energy levels. Nice.

Where Did the Week Go?

Wow, that really flew by quickly. I've been so busy that I haven't taken time to enjoy much of anything. Bummer. Ah well, too much work to do this weekend.

The whole "getting into shape thing" is going well (I think, I don't weigh in until tomorrow) but at least this hasn't happened to me, which is nice. And, it will be awhile before I can do this.

The Biggest Squirrely Loser

The wife and I have started a little household competition. It is the Biggest Loser... Squirrel Style. So we weighed in yesterday morning (Monday, 01 Jan 07) and will weigh in every Monday until April 2nd. Each week, the one with the highest percentage lost will win some sort of prize (TBD, although mine will probably involve a nurses outfit, handcuffs, and toothpaste... just sayin'). The final weigh-in and total percentage "loser" will win the grand prize. We still don't know what that is, but it will be really, really good (although, to be fair, what is better than ass-less chaps, a rented casket, and baby oil?!? Seriously..).

This otta be fun.

Happy New Year!

I'll be spending the day with the kinder, while Sexy Squirrel heads out to a scrapbooking event. Hope you have a fantastic one!

Insufferable

Lately my wife has indicated to me that I've become insufferable. As far as I can tell I have crossed over into some sort of cockiness. While I can chalk some of that up to holiday stressors, she is right. I see where she is coming from, but there is a method to my madness.

Confidence is an extremely interesting attribute. For some, it never materializes and in others it is fleeting. Some are even-keeled and still others suffer from delusions of grandeur. The latter is known as arrogance (the evil doppelganger of confidence).

A few close friends and I recently started a business. In short, we provide security solutions in extremely hostile environs. This is a fairly large step to take in life but I do so with very little hesitation. As I've written before, I was taught something about success. Success occurs when preparation and opportunity coalesce. I have been preparing to run a corporation for some time, and now opportunity presents itself. Welkommen.

I have had a lot of triumphs in my life and many failures. Fear of failure haunted me in my youth, but is no longer a companion. Prime Minister Churchill once noted that, "Success is going from failure to failure without a loss of enthusiam. " Part of mitigating this fear of failure involves false motivation.

False motivation was a technique that I learned in my earliest years as an infantryman. Without digressing into war stories, suffice it to say that the physical and mental discomfort that an infantryman endures on a regular day crushes other mortals. When life is at its worst, it may be time to turn to false motivation. It is my experience that false motivation quickly turns into the genuine article.

So, I have become cocky, but falsely so. I am merely providing myself with the energy required to make decisions that will affect friends and family in this business venture. It is a surprisingly heavy burden to carry. It is more difficult for me than being for directly responsible for men in combat. Isn't it funny that my "comfort zone" is combat? This burden has transferred here to the Squirrel's Nest and now the wife tires of my energy and incessant talk of business.

Just awhile honey. I'm getting myself psyched for this new battle.

Success!

All Hail JD! The bottle of single malt worked like a charm and we are back in business. See Peggy, it really does work!

WOO HOO! More crappy blogging coming to a squirrel's nest near you!

Yearrrggghhh!

Unfortunately, I can no longer post during daylight hours (meaning at work). Unfortunately, our firewalls/web protection software thinks that blogger is a "Sex Site." Man, I freakin' wish! Anyway, as I work from 5 am until 8 pm, this will put a major damper in my posting. You poor, poor bastards! Hopefully, this too will pass.

Stupid Meetings

Greetings, gentle readers. I have been occupied at my day job with ridiculously long meetings (the nerve)! I only wish that they were interesting. As they are not, I’ve been brain-dead after work and not really up for posting. I’ll see if I can get the juices flowing here in awhile and get something crappy out to you soon. In the meantime, consider this an

Open Thread!