Friday, October 21, 2005

Handy Dandy Translation Guide For Anti-war Protestors

Nuance: Opposition to United States policy. Often expressed in simplistic terms.

Peace: The complete lack of action from the United States no matter how many must suffer or die.

Dissent: Wearing costumes.

Crushing of Dissent/McCarthyism: Publicly disagreeing with someone more noble. Publicly pointing out flaws in the arguments of those more noble.

Censorship: Only appearing on TV 5 times a week instead of the full 7.

Days of Action: Movie where Tom Cruise met Nicole Kidman.

Facts: Things that get in the way of Truth.

Truth: Something that must be believed regardless of facts. Example: 5,000 civilians were killed in Afghanistan. Did not actually happen, but the US wanted to kill that many and more so that means it is truth.

Racism: Thinking non-whites shouldn't have to live under oppressive, murderous tyrants.

Solidarity: Public nudity to tell those who would be stoned for public nudity that, hey, we care because we're naked.

Multilateral: Doing what the French want.

Unilateral: Going forward without the support of the New York Times.

Oil: When it ain't the Jews, it's this.

Militant: Anyone who kills a member of the oppressive power structure.

Heh.

Hat tip- Reader Jay